two of his most used quotes are

"we accept the love we think we deserve."

&

"it may take more than love to keep the poison down." [mp3]

the latter one never really affected me much but i know that it was an important one to him so it stuck in my head, maybe with the hope that some day it would become clear what the hell he was talking about.

the first quote was from an author named Stephen Chbosky. it was in a manuscript that he'd read that was about to be published by mtv books. it had stuck with me because it was the thing that made me allow him into my life. not at first, but later, with much reflection.

our relationship had always been weird and this was especially so when we'd first met and become friends. if i had to pick just one word to sum it up, i think i'd pick "animosity."

i'd always been against getting together with him, but he was anything if persistent--and he had a way with words so i stuck out the friendship and eventually--after almost 2 years--he was over at my place one night and i asked him, point blank: "so are we gonna go to bed?"

and we did. and it was wonderful.

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